10 Advices On How To Make New Year Resolutions Work

Sylvia Silvers
7 min readJan 1, 2021
Image credit of @pichitkamsing on Freepik

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re doing something.

~Neil Gaiman~

I’ve been making new resolutions for a long, long time, and I’ve been procrastinating on some things, and sometimes, I’ve achieved more than my goals, too.

Every year, I’ve learned, made mistakes, fell, stood up, moved forward, and became much stronger and smarter. Surviving 2019 and 2020 made my expectation for 2021 very optimistic. Especially in 2020, we were not declining but growing.

I put in my journals every piece of advice that works or not during all these years. All the advice from my mentors, books that I read, seminars, and classes that I attend, people I met along my journey, as well as my own experiences as a woman entrepreneur.

By sharing my notes, I hope to motivate you so that you’ll stand stronger and keep moving forward in 2021. Here are some of the useful strategies that I use to overcome my obstacles and I will continue doing this year:

  1. Work On Your Homework

A genius is just a talented person who does his homework. ~Thomas A. Edison~

Finish whatever goals that you have for 2020 and focus on them. Do not start the new one until you achieve your last year's goals.

I love to learn something new. It’s a good thing and a bad thing for me. Most of the time, it leads me to the shiny object syndrome; which is doing opposite things rather than stay focused on things that I started earlier.

I’ve learned to say NO to a thousand things and focus on one thing and get it done before starting something else.

Whatever new ideas pop up in my mind, I write them down in my journal and keep them safe until I may need them one day.

2.Work On Your Health

“A healthy man has many wishes, a sick man only one.” ~Indian proverb~

I feel grateful that I was blessed with good health in 2020 so that I can continue working towards my goals.

Healthy for me means overall health; which is physical and mental health. For physical health, I do my best every day to eat nutritious food and exercise. For mental health, I practice meditation every day and keep learning to improve.

I saw how my mom suffered when she was sick, and it scared her and me as well. She is an energetic person, the biggest workaholic I’ve ever known in my life. But when she was sick that week, her world stopped. She told me that it was so scary to feel that her days might be over, yet she still has many things undone. She said that she knew that everybody came to see her, yet she had no energy even to blink her eyes. From that day on, she pays attention to her health more than ever.

You may have all the plans and goals, but you can achieve anything only if you have your health.

3. Work On Your Relationship

“The relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have.” ~Robert Holden~

Have you ever questioned yourself? What do you really want in your life? Why you do the things that you do?

We have two sides inside of us—a good version of us and a bad one. Get to know those two versions of you, make a good friend with them. Never run away and feel ashamed of your bad side. It’s a part of you. Accept it, and love it the same way you love the good side of you.

When you have a good relationship with yourself, you’ll win all other relationships in your life.

4. You Don’t Have To Aim The Moon If It’s Too Far Away

Do you remember the famous quote, “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.”? This quote helps me to push myself out of my comfort zone.

I realize everyone has their own phase to achieve something. Do whatever best for you to achieve your goal. Anything that gives you the fire and the reason to wake up in the morning full of energy will work.

Taking baby steps works for me. I need to “see” where I am going and slowly move to achieve my “moon.”

“If you don’t know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else.” ~Lawrence J. Peter~

What I learn from 2020 was I be reasonable with my goals. I did my monthly goal, and it was easier for me to achieve my yearly goals.
2021, I will shorten my step by step to weekly goals. It will keep me on track with where I am going and will make me stay focused.

5.Comparing Wisely

“Look in the mirror rather than at your neighbor.”
~Frank Sonnenberg~

I have stopped comparing myself to others. I see those in front of me as an inspiration to move my ass and stop finding excuses.

The only one I compare myself to is myself. I want to be a better version of myself each day. I remind myself to do my best to live without regrets. I’ll do whatever it takes to make myself happier, and I’ll work hard on it.

6. Accept The Challenges

“Life is about accepting the challenges along the way, choosing to keep moving forward, and savoring the journey.”
~Roy T. Bennett~

Challenges push us to think out of the box and be comfortable with our uncomfortable. I love the challenges because I know I’ll grow from them.

See things from a different angle, and remind yourself that everything happens for a great reason. If it works for me, it will work for you too!

7.Stop Feeling Sorry

“Never seek to please anyone. Seek to evolve thyself.”
~Lailah Gifty Akita~

Dare to say yes to yourself and no to others.
One of my biggest obstacles is feeling sorry when I can’t help. Most of the time, I sacrifice my own needs when needed to save myself before you can save the world.

You may understand this if you resonance with it. Once you delay things on your list, you sacrifice your needs, and when you realize it, the list is getting longer. It only makes things worse, and by the time it happens, you’ll need to push yourself even harder and lose a lot of energy because of it.

2021, I will remind myself to stop feeling sorry to say no and start to focus on my goals. It may sound egoist, but who else to blame than me when I procrastinate? And by the way, there is an interesting concept called “positive egoism.” Check it out if you want to learn more about it.

8. Believe In Yourself

“Often the most tricky questions are the ones we secretly know the answers of.
What are you running from?
What are you waiting for?”
~Sanhita Baruah~

Always Go with your gut. You know what works or not for you. Stop asking someone whose never been to the place where you want to be. I’ve made this mistake before, and I keep reminding myself to this day to respond with a smile when those people gave me their advice.

Start asking yourself the right questions, and never doubt your answers!

Your mentors, your friends could give you advice or options, but the decision is in your hand.
You are responsible for your mind, your body, your future.

9. Watch Out Your Surroundings

“Surround yourself , not by those who constantly put on a show , but by those who quietly conquer the world.”
~Christine E. Szymanski~

One of the reasons why 2020 is a very successful year for Silver and me is because we surround ourselves with the right people. We were in the right environment, with people who encourage us to be our best selves and inspire us to grow and be better each day.

The environment is very, very important. You may notice the way you think, speak, and behave is the way your surroundings are. So, watch out who you spend your time with.

10. Rest When You Feel Tired

“Rest and be thankful.”
~William Wadsworth~

Listen to your body more. Love yourself.

Nowadays, we are getting busier and busier; we want to do more and more things and get them done faster. When all the news from social media, magazines, or newspapers make you sick and tired, you feel like you are not getting anywhere ; take a rest from it.

Taking a step backward works very well for me. By the time everything seems falling apart, I left and did my silence meditation for a week. That week was the most tranquil week in my life. All I could hear was myself. There were no other noises but my own. I found my voice; I found myself.

Meditation opens my mind. It feels like looking at the world from a clearer view, with a different perspective.

Don’t get me wrong. Meditation didn’t make me a holy person. I will still be angry or sad from time to time. That’s what makes me a human. By practicing meditation, I acknowledge my emotion, and I can control myself better. When the bad side of me appear, I know in advance and deal with it before I hurt myself or someone else. That is why I need to keep practicing and surround myself with those who support me on my journey.

Wherever you are, remember to feel grateful and blessed. We are entering 2021, so let’s make it work!

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Sylvia Silvers

Sylvia Silvers is a love and intimacy coach who works with women entrepreneurs to reconnect with their men, even when the relationship is already cold.